singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
