honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
