I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
