good thing vaginas are great cup holders
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
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