But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Can you repeat that, but with context?
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