Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
