she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
