great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
