If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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