thus making me awesome and them whores
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize