were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
