So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
