Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
