You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Randomize
