You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Operation Purity has been aborted
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
