That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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