im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
