try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
