A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
foreskin is a definite game changer
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
