If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
