its not stalking. its research.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
