"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
