Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize