Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
we're so committed to being not committed
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
