I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
