Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
