We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
