you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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