My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
