I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
