Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
where does the pee come out of this thing
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize