Small penises have feelings too.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
