with your own penis?
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
