TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
