he thought i was a dude.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
