all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I smell like Dick and happiness
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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