Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
