Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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