My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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