I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Randomize
