with your own penis?
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Randomize
