my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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