i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
