fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Randomize
