the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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