Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
