I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
