i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
