Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize