I think my vagina is haunted
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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